Wednesday, July 30, 2008

The Educated Illetrate and his grandmother.

Just to give you an indication of how powerful, the TV as a media is, read this.

I was in the third standard when this happened. Good old Doordarshan days. There used to be a sustained campaign for literacy in India. There was this awesome promo ad which featured a lady singing 'Purab se Surya Uga' at the top of her voice.

Nothing wrong with her voice alright. But the promo campaign was aired so many times that I asked my parents what the hell was that about, coz you know, I understood zilch when it comes to Hindi. My dad explained in right earnest that it has to do with the alarming rate of Illetracy, and how much it's hurting India. I couldn't figure out how people can be without going to school. Though it sounded cool, somehow it felt not right to me. As I started a spate of questions, My pop just told me that people who did not study are called Illetrates.

I was a sucker for contradictions. I saw the video 'Everybody wants to rule the world' by Tears for Fears band and saw for myself how beautiful America looked when I compared this to the drivel I saw in Tamil cinema songs.

Right there, I made a resolution that I would strive to remove the problem of Illetracy and promote Literacy. I drew up a list of people that were very close to me, as I wanted to make sure my own folks and friends aren't hitting Mother India below the belt. (I wonder if she does wear a belt).

Including the 3 pretty girls next house, the number went upto 9, including my grandparents. I could see the 3 pretty girls were going to school, and my mum and dad went to office. That ruled them out. Out of the remaining four, I had strong suspicion about my grandmother, as she repeatedly kept mispronouncing homework.

Once I drew up the list, I couldn't wait for my dad to get home. I obviously didn't tell him what the list was for, just lied that it was my school homework. My worst fears became true, when I found out that my grandmother wasn't educated.

Even though I was embarrased to have an illetrate grandmother, I loved her much that I did not want to disown her. I decided to take the matter in my own hands and drew up a plan. Those were the days of 6 days a week work for Government offices, and both my parents had to go to work on Saturdays. On the other hand, my school had a local holiday every Wednesday, as we had the local flea market.

I began to use the Wednesday to educate my grandmother. Since I realised that she's poor at pronounciations, I started with some easy English pronounciations. Apparently, I wasn't a good teacher. I took me 3 hours to teach her how to pronounce 'Sky'. Everytime I said 'Sky' and asked her to repeat it, she either just laughed or said 'High'.

After 3 weeks of hard English lessons, I had taught her 7 words. Sky, Salt, Pepper, World and other 3 words which I don't remember now. On the fourth Wednesday, my father was home. And as soon as the clock struck 10 A.M, I started my classes. For a while, my dad did not realise what was going on, as I asked my grandmother repeatedly to say 'Plants'.

When he wanted to know what I was doing, I asked him to step aside, and told him very seriously that he should not be telling Granma that she's hurting India by being an Illetrate. She might get hurt you know. I told him, I was just educating her, so that Mother India would forgive her.

For a long time, I never realised why my father burst out with laughter. Though he kept a poker face, and he called me the 'Education minister of India'. At my age, I thought it was something cool and powerful. I even told the pretty girls about my new mantle, and they went, 'Awwwwwwww, you're a minister'.

Now it's kind of funny. But I realise how TV and 'Purab se Surya Uga' had made an impact on my tender mind. Are you doing justice to your media, Sun TV, Vijay TV, Northie TV's?

Youtube link of the day.
No prizes for guessing - http://youtube.com/watch?v=Va_ml6k7_Fk

2 comments:

'Stung by the splendor of a sudden thought!' said...

lol, pity your grandmom...look at what she had to put up with at her old age :))

Seen the ad way too many times for comfort...if DD happened to be your only source of entertainment, you'd have had to suffer from short term memory loss to escape it!

btw, brilliant touch with the intentionally misspelt theme.

Anonymous said...

this piece of ur work made me laugh till i get stomach pain. i dont understand y on earth she had to undergo this torture :O